Sometimes, I feel like I have no value.
So here's what I did about it.
When I came back to social media after taking a whole year off and scaling back my business, I had this vision:
I earn a meaningful living just by being myself.
I am celebrated for who I am.
I’m not performing. So, creation and work feel easy.
Sounds simple.
Just be yourself! Authenticity rules! The money will come!
But here's what I learned in the last five months since returning from my sabbatical, attempting to execute this deceptively simple vision:
Being yourself is hard when you're unsure of who you are without the titles, niches, and other labels.
Being ‘you’ naturally means being unique. No one else will be exactly like you, so you won't have a roadmap to follow.
Authenticity can mean sharing things that may feel vulnerable or incomplete. As Rick Rubin wrote, some things hit so close home that our need to protect ourselves supersedes our desire to share our work.
As you can see, the “strategy” of being yourself is easy to preach but hard to master.
This is why you'll be inconsistent, unsure, and likely working at a slower pace than you'd expect — or at least, that’s what I’ve found.
You must get yourself to a level where you feel safe enough to be seen as you are, and sometimes, figuring out what makes you feel unsafe and fostering a sense of safety will inevitably take time.
Yet, earning a living by being yourself is the highest and most fulfilling level you can unlock. I personally think it's worth being patient for.
If you want some motivation, here’s what my mentor Joe explained. There are levels to this shit:
Level #1: Doing ($)
You trade time for money by doing things for others. You provide a service. You're a video editor. A writer. A graphic designer. A financial model builder. You get the point.
Level #2: Communicating ($$)
You make money teaching the masses. You articulate your subject matter expertise. You're a teacher, a coach, speaker, or a consultant.
Level #3: Being ($$$)
You get paid for being as you are. Your existence alone is magnetizing. You're an influencer—not the terminology we use on social media, but an actual person of influence. You're a role model, an icon.
Unlocking Level 3 means living a life where your presence alone is enough to inspire and influence others.
It's about being celebrated for your true self and earning a meaningful living by simply existing as you are.
And by the way, I break this down visually in this YouTube video, showing a clip of Joe coaching me through this exact concept:
Click here to watch the full video
Yet, many of us don’t know how to present ourselves without the labels that define us.
Here’s a test:
Can you introduce yourself to someone without mentioning your name, age, occupation, ethnicity, and location?
After returning from my year-long sabbatical, this became a source of struggle for me.
Without my business, “I make $XXXk/month doing XYZ," and my niche, I could not bring myself to accept podcast interviews, speaking engagements, or even make new friends.
The truth is, without the labels and accolades, I tell myself that I have no value to offer.
And if I feel I have nothing of value to offer, then I don’t feel prepared to be seen.
The reason why it’s rare for people to unlock “Level 3: Being ($$$)” is that many of us subconsciously believe that the things that make us “us” are not worthy enough to be celebrated, shared, or monetized.
So here’s what I did:
I wanted to explore my life experiences and understand what type of value I bring to the table.
So, using Notion, I made an inventory of all my life experiences, including those in my business and personal life:
When you click each story, it looks something like this, with the summary, key lessons, and core values:
How does this help?
We often don’t see how a seemingly simple event in our lives can be meaningful, especially outside of our niche.
Yet, with the help of a 3rd party, when you see all of the values, lessons, and themes emerging from your life experiences, you’ll eventually realize that there are many things you can share and speak about!
If you follow this process and write a variety of stories, you may learn that:
1) Specific core values overlap, which can tell you a lot about yourself. For example, “Authenticity” appeared in many of my stories, which told me much about what I value.
2) You’ve accumulated many life lessons that you can share with others through content, speaking, or even just making a new friend. For example, something as silly as frying my hair brought up lessons about self-worth, beauty standards, confidence, and more.
In fact, many of us operate in “Unconscious Competence” - meaning there’s a lot of value you hold that you’re not even aware of.
By doing this story inventory exercise, using something like ChatGPT can help you step outside of yourself and become aware of the greatness you do not even see.
3) You become proud of who you are and what you’ve been through (even if it seems insignificant to you!).
It’s a reminder that your life, not just your niche, is worth sharing with others.
Want to make your own story inventory? Here’s the instructions!
Step 1: Open up ChatGPT and ask them to be your storytelling coach.
Prompt Example:
“I am working on building a story bank for my personal brand.
I’ll be sending you a variety of stories about my life.
Pretend to be my story telling coach and ask me 5 questions to help each story go deeper”
Step 2: Once ChatGPT understands the assignment, tell it something you experienced. This does not need to be related to your niche.
For me, in addition to sharing my experiences about running my business, I also shared other experiences such as "How I Repaired My Relationship With My Father”, “How I Lost 10lbs During My Sabbatcal”, “How I Repaired My Hair”, “My Grandpa’s Entrepreneurial Journey”, “Being the Eldest Daughter”
Prompt Example:
“During my sabbatical, I got a lot closer with my Dad. I used to have a distant relationship with him. My parents are divorced and I resented him. Can you ask me 5 questions to develop this story more?”
Step 3: Answer the questions. Before sending your responses back to ChatGPT, ask ChatGPT to summarize your story and to identify the core lessons , the core values, and the central themes of the story.
Prompt Example:
“<Insert your answers to the questions, or write even more about the experience you went through>
Based on what you know about this story, can you please:
1. Summarize the key points of the story
2. Identify the lessons learned from the story
3. Identify the central themes from the story
4. Identify the core values from the story”
Step 4: Repeat the process.
Step 5: Organize your stories in one place using Google Drive, Notion, Trello, or any other organization tool you have.
Psst… I made a FREE template exclusively for The Creator Journal readers!
Step 1: Click here to access the Story Inventory Template.
Step 2: Click the “Duplicate” button on the top right corner to save it to your workspace:
Please note you need at least a free Notion account to get started. Click here to make one!
If you liked this newsletter, then you’ll love this accompanying video:
In this YouTube video, I talk about my lack of confidence after returning from my sabbatical, some intimate clips of my mentor coaching me, and why I needed to withdraw from social media (again).
While this is only the tip of the iceberg of discovering your true self and building a genuine personal brand, I feel so grateful to be able to share my experience and resources with you.
I hope sharing pieces of my journey helps you navigate your own :)
Until the next one, do something fearless today,
Vanessa
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